It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
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I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
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So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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