If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Its about making memories worth repressing
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Holy shit dude........stairs
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
