Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
