he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
is this the sara with the beer cane?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
