Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
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