Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
