Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
farters have to be the big spoon...
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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