nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
dude i'm inner monologue high
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I am naked and annoyed.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
