Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
