I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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