gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
