Will you blow on my dice?
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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