This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
