"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
