South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
