so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
