i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
What drink are we having for lunch?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
