I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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