Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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