its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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