I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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