but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
