I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
