I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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