I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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