My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Randomize
