like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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