For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Randomize
