Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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