She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
