New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I'm way too hungover for life right now
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
