I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I will pee on everything he values.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
