people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
