I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize