I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize