why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Randomize
