Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
