Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
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I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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