i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
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