He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize