he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
A+ Viking dick
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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