She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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