I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
me + whiskey = a bad person
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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