there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
