evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
