That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
