So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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