Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
