i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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