Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
