i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
It's no shave November. This is our time.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
